Reprise number two... Fire!

Originally sampled in April of 2006 as "Sometimes it's better to go it alone."

Spend as many hours watching people browsing an adult video store as I do and you'll have noticed trends in behavior. As politically incorrect as it may be, almost everyone passing my front door slots themselves into a profile in a matter of seconds. It's actually rather disturbing. Makes me wonder about my own habitual behaviors, but that is another topic for another day.

Far and away, men are the most commonly seen gender entering the store. We're a video store and since most of them are geared for men, it tends to forge a self-sustaining cycle. It also provides me an ever expanding sample to base my observations upon.

Men coming into the store alone most often will exhibit body language and actions that are confident and relaxed. They speak in conversational tones. They will either go right to the section of the store they desire and make a selection with a minimum of effort or will take some time to browse. Most often, they have no anxiety in asking about products or titles if they have not found them in their initial searches. The stress level is low.

If they are uncomfortable, it is easy to address them, be calmly professional and let them catch their breath. Any self-consciousness about being reassured by a store clerk is usually easily gotten past because no one is there to witness. It's no big deal and they feel more confident afterward.

Then there are the men who come into the store with a woman. Suddenly, you notice little currents around them. Depending on whether it's the man driving this visit to the store, the woman, or a mutual decision. In some instances, the man seems to need to project a worldly and thorough knowledge of all the adult industry has to offer. In many cases, it is taken to an extreme of him acting in an arrogantly indulgent manner to his companion. In other occasions, the male in the pair will be silent and following his companion about the store. This can even go so far as to be in essence subsumed by her will.
What is really interesting is when one of the pair has a negative opinion of something. I have seen men deliver withering looks and back-handed comments to the woman they are shopping with who makes the mistake of showing interest in a movie genre or toy that discomfits them. At the same time, I have observed upon more than one occasion a woman take her male companion down several notches for the same sin.

The flip-side of this coin is when two men come into the store together. You'd think much of the time that with two men shopping the store together that they'd perhaps be romantically involved. That rarely seems to be the case. As a result, the men seem to fall into carefully maintained demeanors. One of which is to act jaded, to imply by body language that it was their buddy that wanted to come into the store. This is a behavior that thrills me to my toenails let me tell you. Nothing like the implication that people need to be ashamed to be in the store or somehow deficient in some relationship/sexual regard. They will browse the stores with a polished casualness. They will make comments and observations designed to show they are above such carnal things. The least implication that their companion is interested in what they might like to buy or perhaps that their friend finds it worthy of even a shred of scorn, will instantly put them into a defensive "I-wasn't-really-interested-in-that-I-was-just-messing-around" mode. I hate that. Not only does it kill the sale I hope to make, but it makes the rest of my customers slightly uncomfortable. The other default is what I tend to think of as "frat boy cliché" behavior. They cannot exhibit anything which might be taken as serious. They will laugh loudly, act expansively, and talk in loud, boisterous tones. They will search the movie titles in order to find fodder for jokes. They will target the toy section in order to try and one-up their buddy with more and more personally extreme toys.

Couples can be the best or the worst of customers. When they are here together, shopping in concert, the male will seem to exhibit the better of the single male shopper traits. If the relationship has issues, it will find a way to broadcast to the store environment. If the two of them are just friends, most of the time the men will conform to the more negative behaviors in the hopes of protecting themselves by not exposing "weakness" and exploiting any perceived "weakness" in their companion.

Three or more people entering the store together regardless of the mix of women to men, provided there is a man in the group, he will fall into a role. It is virtually unheard of for me to observe a man in such a group not adopting a posture. If there are more women than men in the group, the men will usually attempt to shock or corrupt the women. If there are more men than women, one may adopt the "been there, done that, unimpressed" pose, but mostly they seem to choose the "frat boy cliché" option. The more males or appropriately attentive females, the more they play it up. I would say the obnoxiousness of the men is an exponential progression to the number of additional party members.

In short, if you happen to be a guy, unless you have a kick-ass relationship, your adult store shopping experience will be vastly improved as a solo mission.