Something going 'round

Sweet Shiva on a sybian! I think someone's been pissing in the local water supply, which is why I enjoy the sweet, sweet tears of terrified toddlers over glacial ice gently crushed with the skulls of polar bear cubs. I jest, I'd never abuse a polar bear.

In any case, there has been a marked increase in incidences of crabby people over the last few days. For instance, I recently had the distinct pleasure of a middle-aged Asian gentleman coming into the store in a perfect little snit.

I looked up to see him moving purposely toward the arcade. When he saw me looking up at his entrance, he grunted something I interpreted as a greeting. So I responded with a pleasant greeting of my own. He snarled something back at me and disappeared into the arcade area. A few minutes later, about the time it would take to walk to the depth of the hallway and out again, he reemerges. I notice he's puffing away on a cigarette. So I attempt to politely inform him that smoking is not allowed in the building. Once again he snarls something at me I cannot understand and storms out the front door chugging a stream of tobacco smoke like he's imitating a steam engine.

I contented myself with hoping the sea urchin that crawled up his colon would stage a dramatic escape soon while I liberally sprayed air freshener along his rank contrail.