Just like Easter, they won't find the body
I was at work, peacefully going about my duties when one of those customers wandered in. He was quiet and so it was not immediately apparent the full extent of his rummaging. Once he wandered to another section with a tall stack of VHS boxes, I was able to comprehend the migraine this knuckle-dragging clod was insisting upon visiting upon me.
He started looking at other movies in his new location, picking up some and putting back those that ceased to appeal regardless of whether he picked them up from that area or not. Simply placing his rejects on a shelf, any shelf, is enough.
I'm now mentally charting his course while attempting to gracefully straighten up the first section he reduced to a chaotic smear of boxes precariously heaped upon the shelving. My temper is simmering, my tolerance for allowing this retail abortion to continue waning rapidly. But he is moving toward the counter, I may soon be quit of him with a sale to boot.
I watch with ill humor as the prodigious pile of movies in his hands melts away onto the shelves until he lays three atop the counter. Cheap ones at that. To put it baldly, I am not even faintly amused. One of his selections has suffered a mishap which has delivered a sizeable rent in the packaging, though the cassette is untouched. He wanted that one further discounted. Perhaps that movie had been previously discounted due to the damaged box? No, of course not. That would make too much sense. Nope, obviously the price we had it marked at on the BLOODY CLEARANCE RACK was the full pristine price.
Needless to say, he declined to purchase that one. He offered to put it back. I demurred strongly. The fucker actually thought he was being conscientious in the commission of his vandalism.
Netted less than twenty bucks on that bozo and we were still finding orphan boxes on the floor three hours later. Just how in the bloody blue blazes he managed to redistribute so many movies in the time he was here continues to astound me. Granted the next time I see him I'll be hard pressed not to take a ball-peen hammer to his knuckles, but I'm an optimist. It's remotely possible he'd learn after a couple dozen repetitions of the lesson.
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