Monday, March 19, 2007

Kelly green wrack and ruin

I'm so glad the St. Patrick's Day weekend is now over. Any time of the year that is popularly linked with prodigious consumption of alcohol carries with it the seeds of vexation. I don't know why people find it particularly irresistible to visit the porn store after getting utterly soused. They just do.

It would be one thing if these drunks were even moderately interested in buying things, but somewhere in their spirit-addled pates they have decided we're some delightful cross between museum and zoo. Which provides such wonderful experiences as ostensibly soto voce jokes and comments which rattle the plate glass display cases in their sonic boom or dazed questions because they cannot fathom just how lubricant would be used.

Not that I would wish further aggravation and stupidity upon others having to stand in the face of such wags, I could wish they'd have restrained themselves to one of the many strip clubs in the area. At least they're better equipped to drain the unwary celebrant's bank account under such conditions. Far easier the task of urging yet another pitcher of beer upon the man scant feet from a contorting naked woman, than to convince him of the urgency of needing to buy a new DVD of women putting the "ping pong ball trick" to shame.

Nevertheless, once again the store was once again spared from fire, famine, viking raid, and dire gerbil stampede by the blood, sweat, and developing ulcers of the staff.

It's amazing what people will do for a paycheque.

2 Comments:

Blogger Unknown said...

A cross between a museum and a zoo, where the animals have escaped, I imagine.

I don't know how you do it sometimes,Lanius.

7:05 AM  
Blogger Merripan said...

On a completely aside note: Something that my fiance just saw on a local porn shop... "Return to Romance..." Yeah - because nothing says romance like bukkake midget porn, or Ron Jeremy's hairy-bobbin' man-ass... I shudder at the thought!

LOL.

And no, I couldn't help it... I had to share - he shared with me, therefore others should feel the need to bleach their inner eyeballs as well.

~M

5:15 PM  

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