Voices carry
More and more it appears that shoppers believe their conversations can only be heard by the person(s) they are speaking to as if purely out of convenience their voices shift to a register only discernible to each other and certain species of nocturnal animals.
Fewer groups seem to make any effort to modulate their volume to a discrete level. Indeed some give every indication that as a side-line to selling porn movies and novelties we stress test jet engines and host immense raves necessitating shouting to be heard by the person standing six inches away.
Those who have not experienced it can scarcely comprehend the impact of being subjected to some stranger elaborating in detail about their experiences with fisting or how their extremely hush-hush affair is progressing on the opposite side of the store. In addition, they choose to believe their discourse is limited to their own ears despite being at a volume that not only carries over a couple thousand square feet, various fixtures, other customers, and the in-store music system.
They must because they are shocked, affronted, and or embarrassed when a staff member approaches them and ever so gently cautions that they can be heard many feet away or directs them to a section devoted to the fetish that was their most recent topic of interested conversation.
More than once I have been informed brusquely that it's incredibly rude to eavesdrop on private conversations, especially in an adult store. More than once, I have replied that any assumptions they might have been laboring under as to who is privy to their words became erroneous the moment I could hear them four aisles distant without any intent. Provide me with no recourse except fleeing the store to avoid hearing how your last anal plug fractured during your last vigorous tryst leading to adventures in novice proctology with a pair of barbeque tongs and I'm going to assume you want to share this anecdote with the world whether they will or no. Damn skippy I'm going to remark upon it.
On a slightly related note, ever notice a correlation between how loud someone insists on being in public and how hideously stupid they are? Emptier the head, the more strenuously they vocalize. It's one of the reasons I loathe public transportation.
Fewer groups seem to make any effort to modulate their volume to a discrete level. Indeed some give every indication that as a side-line to selling porn movies and novelties we stress test jet engines and host immense raves necessitating shouting to be heard by the person standing six inches away.
Those who have not experienced it can scarcely comprehend the impact of being subjected to some stranger elaborating in detail about their experiences with fisting or how their extremely hush-hush affair is progressing on the opposite side of the store. In addition, they choose to believe their discourse is limited to their own ears despite being at a volume that not only carries over a couple thousand square feet, various fixtures, other customers, and the in-store music system.
They must because they are shocked, affronted, and or embarrassed when a staff member approaches them and ever so gently cautions that they can be heard many feet away or directs them to a section devoted to the fetish that was their most recent topic of interested conversation.
More than once I have been informed brusquely that it's incredibly rude to eavesdrop on private conversations, especially in an adult store. More than once, I have replied that any assumptions they might have been laboring under as to who is privy to their words became erroneous the moment I could hear them four aisles distant without any intent. Provide me with no recourse except fleeing the store to avoid hearing how your last anal plug fractured during your last vigorous tryst leading to adventures in novice proctology with a pair of barbeque tongs and I'm going to assume you want to share this anecdote with the world whether they will or no. Damn skippy I'm going to remark upon it.
On a slightly related note, ever notice a correlation between how loud someone insists on being in public and how hideously stupid they are? Emptier the head, the more strenuously they vocalize. It's one of the reasons I loathe public transportation.
posted by Lanius at 9:06 PM
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